So the Republican Party in the US are in the middle of their primaries, and in fact, Michigan and Arizona are having their votes today, the polls closing in a little over respectively one and two hours at the time of writing. I’ll have a more comprehensive post on the primaries out in time for Super Tuesday, but for now let’s just take a moment to reflect on the sort of utterly inane campaign strategy that could lead to this:
… and this:
If Romney wins in Michigan, it will not be because of, but in spite of those performances. My guess is that there must at one point have been a brainstorm meeting at the Romney HQ that went something like this:
Campaign Manager: “So… Michigan. Anyone?”
Everyone: “…”
Strategist 1: “We could give Mitt one of those silly cheese hats for his next speech?”
Strategist 2: “I think those are from Wisconsin.”
Strategist 1: “Oh.”
Everyone: “…”
Strategist 2: “What about cars? They make cars in Michigan. Or they used to.”
Campaign Manager: “Okay. Cars. We can work with that.”
Strategist 1: “Yeah, let’s have Mitt talk about all the cars he and his wife own. To show that he’s just one of the average guys, you know.”
Strategist 2: “And then we’ll do an ad about how they used to be really good at making cars, but now they basically suck. They’ll love that.”
Campaign Manager: “Brilliant! I think we’ve got this one wrapped up.”
I’m convinced that’s exactly how that meeting went.
In other and unrelated news, I’ll go out on a limb and predict a significant win for Rick Santorum in Michigan.
(PS. Comedy Central: I’m available as a script writer. Call me!)